After Sleening with My Childh
Chapter 92
Chapter 92
- Talk Talk–Talking
<<. Avery. >>
“It’s our wedding video…” He says, and my heart drops to the pit of my stomach.
“It’ll be fun to look back,” he adds.
But I don’t feel that way. I don’t remember our wedding or if I was happy. I don’t remember the trail of events that led to that decision. Was it a desperate move made by me?
I remember nothing. Around those days, I felt a deep sense of shame and disgust for my appearance. I was fresh out of a breakup. My memories are not nice. I don’t know who the witness was. Were there any guests? They must have been judging me for being fat.. Miles must have looked stunning. People must have thought we were an odd couple.
I don’t want to watch the video because I am afraid I might harm this relationship with my insecurities even before it starts.
Ethan’s words have scarred me for years and I can still feel the pinch sometimes.
‘Do you have any idea what people say when they see us together? My sisters tell me I can do better than some fat ugly chick. I feel fucking ashamed to even take you out for dinner.‘ He had told me that day.
He grabs the remote and I blare out, “I don’t really feel like watching it right now.”
Miles looks at me quizzically. “Why not? Don’t you want to see how beautiful you looked in your dress? By the way, I selected that one. We had a blast while dress shopping.”
My heart clenches.
“Is that in the video?” I ask hopefully. Was I happy while dress shopping?
Miles tsks. “No. This video is only from the wedding ceremony.”
I shake my head. “Then I just don’t really feel like it. Can we do something else instead?” I mumble, hoping he’ll drop the subject.
I want to tell him the truth, but I’m scared that he’ll be disappointed in me.
“Sure, we can do something else. What do you want to do?”
I breathe a sigh of relief. “I don’t know. Maybe we could take a stroll. Get some fresh air?”
Miles turns off the tv and drawls. “Or we could fuck…
I laugh.
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After Sleening with My Childhood Dri
1 Vicked 11m Out from My World
Chapter 92
“Yes, we could,” I say, smiling,
“Wait here…” He walks out of my room and I close my eyes in frustration.
He was so enthusiastic about watching the wedding video. I feel bad. I don’t think I can ever openly admit this to him.
Avery. His voice breaks my chain of thoughts. I look up and he gestures me to come. I frown and follow him out of
my room.
“What are we going to do?”
“We’re gonna play…” he opens a door and my heart skips a beat.
“Is this some Fifty Shades of Gray‘ type of playroom?”
He chuckles and shakes his head.
“I never bought any girls home. There was no need for a playroom here.”
He turns and walks backwards into the room. My eyes are fixed on him.
“Although now that you are my official girlsister. We can turn this room into a sex dungeon.”
I watch him through my eyelashes and he frowns. “Is it okay to talk about past hookups or relationships?”
I shrug. “Once in a while yea… we are not gonna act like we are both virgins,” I say and he looks at me, amused.
I look around. It’s an empty study room with a table and a rope suspended in the middle.
“I am too lazy to assign contractors to my own apartment..”
I snort remembering he owns a goddamn construction company.
That’s a chandelier holder. It can take your weight…” He says and my eyes widen.
“Are you gonna hang me there?”
“For now, I will only tie you….. so you can sway a little…”
That sounds Miles grabs the elastic of my pajamas and pulls me towards the rope. I yelp before I can complete my
sentence.
Up close I can see it’s a bondage rope, made of cotton fiber.
“It’s a twisted rope…” I whisper. It will leave marks.
“Do you want the marks?”
I glance up at him.
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Chapter 92
“What will I say to others? If they ask how I got them?”
How do others do it? Do they proudly wear the scars?
He brushes his finger on my cheek, and I look up at him.
“It won’t take long… So there won’t be any rope marks,” he says, and grabs my arms up to tie them.
My silk nightshirt riles up my waist while he slowly ties the knot.
“Tell me what you know about this position,” He asks, and I am amused. It’s like a test they do at the barn. To make sure, subs in training, remember the rules and everything.
“It will hurt after a while because my arms are above my head…” So he is right about the session being short. “To make sure it doesn’t hurt too much or cause nerve damage, I must hold the rope tied above my wrists.”
Holding the rope distributes the weight. I try to recall what I was taught. But lust is settling in my mind and I am unable to think properly.
I sigh. I guess this is why they recommend you shouldn’t be drunk for a session.
“Good girl,” he says when he is done tying my wrists.
Miles traces my arms, then reaches my waist. I suck in a breath when he slips his hands under my shirt and cups my breasts.
“I hope you are not wearing your favorite bra… Because I am going to shred it into pieces…” He mumbles against my lips.
“Hold still.” I frown when he pulls something from his pocket and a cold sharp tip presses into my skin.
“It’s a knife.”
I freeze in my spot.
My heart beats faster as he takes his time to hook the knife into each button and tear it off. One by one. The shirt finally opens, showing my bare skin beneath. He trails the knife from my navel towards my bra. The sensation of the blade against my skin is both frightening and exciting.
My body shivers. I glance down. The tip is pressed only slightly into my skin, but I am scared as hell. I have my safe word on tip of my tongue but I want to play this out. I look up at Miles‘ face. His eyes are completely focused on the knife. I know I am in safe hands.
He cuts my bra from the middle, and I sigh in relief. “When did you read my file?”
I had mentioned- ‘Interested to try.‘ But I wasn’t expecting this would be the first thing we would do.
He smirks. “Does it matter?”
“Hold still,” he says and snips the bra straps in swift motions, sometimes touching my skin with the blade on purpose
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After Sleening with M., 7912131
Chapter 92
to see me flinch.
He grins. “I have been dying to try things with you… and now that you are here… I won’t let you go.”
He folds the knife and says, “Next time, we will do this with your blindfold on.”
“That sounds scary.”
“That’s what I want.”
“Jerk.” I say and lean in for a kiss.
Miles tastes me real good. I gasp when his hands go to my waist. He slowly rolls my pjs down.
He pulls back and glances me up and down. “You look fabulous like this… open shirt and a thin thong.”
Miles walks away from me toward the table and opens a bag placed on it. I can still feel the ghost of the knife tip on my body. I glance up to check the knot.It is not near the wrist joint, which is a good sign.. We were told ropes and cuffs on or near joints can cause nerve damage and should be avoided.
“There’s something you’re not telling me.” His words take me by surprise.
What?
“About what?”
“You seem really on edge about watching our wedding video. What are you hiding?”
I blink at him. Is he being serious?
I chuckle humorlessly. “It’s not the right time, Miles. Can we drop it?”
He walks towards me. My eyes flicker at the cane in his hand and I swallow hard.
“You were clearly upset, and I don’t want to ignore that.”
In the middle of the act? NO. Untie me,” I order him.
He doesn’t move and gives me a devilish smirk. “What if I say no?”
“He traces the side of my thigh with the cane. I flinch at the cold sensation.
“I am afraid, Miles,” So damn afraid.
“Tell me when you are ready. Or we are not moving.”
“Green.” I whisper, and he strikes my thigh.
I let out a cry and stuff my face in my arm. I haven’t been punished before. Miles rubs the stinging spot with the cane while my whole body shivers in anticipation, expecting more hits. But he doesn’t.
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After Sleening with M.. chalak
Chapter 92
I am in control.
“Green.”
One more strike.
“Green.”
One more strike.
“Harder.”
One more strike.
Tears well up in my eyes and I shake with pain. But it’s not enough.
“HARDER MILES!”
And he swings the cane harder than before.
Tears stream down my face, and I sob. The much needed emotional release. Miles throws the cane on the floor, and he steps closer, rubbing the stinging spot.
“Now tell me and don’t lie. You know I don’t like that.”
I try to process. He has forced me to lower my guards.
“I was fat and ugly on our wedding day. I don’t want to see how loathsome I look. “I sob, and he hugs me tight. “You never would have married me if you didn’t have that ultimatum on your head. I know I was a last resort and I can’t stand to see it played out on video.”
I sob harder after my admission.
“Now you must think I am some pathetic girl with low self–esteem. I am better than that.”
He holds me tight. “That’s not entirely true….” he whispers in a gentle voice.
“You were beautiful on our wedding day, and you’re beautiful now. I didn’t marry you because I had to. I married you because I liked you that evening… I chose you. Not someone else. Do you think I didn’t met girls that evening? I did. But I asked you.”
“Don’t tell me how to feel, Miles.” I say in a breaking voice. I want to be angry that he forced the truth out of my mouth. But deep inside, I know I would have let it rot.
My lips tremble as I pour my heart out. “You don’t know what it’s like to hate your own body, to feel you’re not worthy of love. Even if I have changed, I am worried… what if-
My voice cracks and I cannot complete the sentence. It’s not only about Ethan, but Dad too. I wondered if he would pay more attention if I looked better?
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Chapter 92
“I know it’s absurd, Miles. But sometimes it crosses my mind.”
“I don’t have proof,” he mumbles against my skin. “For me, size never mattered. But I always left the girls behind. With you, I always had an urge to keep in touch.”
I blink. Trying to focus on his words while I can feel numbness creeping up my arms.
“I had to force myself to stop talking to you after that night. I wanted to watch the video because I wished you would remember the special night we shared… Not the marriage, but the night itself.”
He chuckles. “You were wasted, but I never thought you would forget everything…. Honestly, I felt a little hurt. I thought we shared something, but you didn’t remember me at all.”
I lean my head on his shoulder, trying to process his words..
“And the things you feel… we cannot deal with all this in one conversation…”
I collapse into Miles‘ arms. “I’m sorry,” I whisper, “I never thought you felt that way.”
Miles raises his arms, and I feel tugging above my head as he unties the knots.
The blood rushes back into my arms, and I sigh in relief.
He stands there holding me, and murmurs. “We both have issues, but we will get through this….. My whole life, I have seen my mom hide her feelings. Eventually my dad got used to ignoring her… Then he started cheating.”
I listen to him quietly.
“They say like father, like son… I decided I didn’t have it in me to stick to one girl… But with you, I want to try. I think if we try, we’ll get through this together.” He repeats.
“Yes…” I sniff and rub my nose on his shoulder.
He pats my back, and we stand there silently, embracing each other.
“Now, are we gonna fuck, or are you gonna leave me high and dry?” I ask eventually and he lets out a grumbled laugh.
The knife play and the canning has left tingles throughout my whole body. I want to try more.
“Oh dear,” he says, rubbing my thigh. I wince at the sensation. I glance down and see four long red lines.
“I’m gonna tease you so much tonight. You will beg me to stop.”
